When the Pain Outweighs the Fear…

Today I sat in the waiting room of a surgery center.

My husband had shoulder replacement surgery this morning.

Something in his body stopped working as it was supposed to and was causing him pain. Actually, it stopped working a while ago.

After years of pain and discomfort, today became the right moment to fix it.

To replace it.

I think about all the other broken things or things that have stopped working effectively for us in our lives that we continue to live with.

I think about the words my father has said to me my whole life when I’m afraid to take action in the direction I desire for my own life:

“When the pain outweighs the fear, you will act.”

We all have things in our life that cause us pain, a broken or breaking relationship, a job or career that is sucking the life out of us, financial issues, abuse, or addiction issues for ourselves or someone close to us, just to name a few.

Whatever that thing is for you that is causing you pain but you’re afraid to fix it or change it because your fear is winning right now, that’s what I’m talking about.

When the fear of fixing or changing something, the fear of ending something, the fear of moving on from something that’s not working is stronger than the pain it brings by staying or not making the change, we stay stuck.

We don’t make the necessary adjustments or make the move toward change.

We make a choice, consciously or not, we choose to live with the pain.

It’s possible to sit in the ‘fear being stronger than the pain’ for years.

Slowing eating away at us, slowly robbing us of our best life.

Perhaps we tolerate the pain forever, hoping we can hold off the day when the pain’s intensity becomes unbearable, finally forcing us to make a move.

Maybe we’ve convinced ourselves we deserve the pain?

Perhaps we believe we’re not worthy or capable of anything better.

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