My Writings

This is where I come to write about stuff. It is also where I answer questions people ask me at my speaking engagements, through social media or my clients ask during coaching sessions. I know if one person is asking there are others with the same question or who are struggling with the same issue.

When You Freeze and The Alligator is Behind You

Fight or flight is an automatic physiological reaction to an event that is or is perceived as a harmful event, attack, or threat to survival. However, often when in stressful, frightening situations even when we are feeling attacked, literally, or figuratively… our reaction is to freeze.

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Are You a Life Scorekeeper?

Do you keep a tally of how often life goes in your favor versus how often it seems you don’t get the desired outcome you were looking for? When we don’t get what we want we can ruminate over life not being fair and things not going our way.

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Give Up Negative Thinking

Here are just a few comments I hear almost daily… here’s the kicker. Over 90% of you will relate to one or more of these comments. And 99% of you will do nothing about it.

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Stress and Productivity

Gaining the tools to shift your mindset so you are capable in handling life’s challenges in a positive way rather than allowing them to drag you down is what Mental Fitness is all about. It’s time to implement a Mental Fitness Program at your organization.

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Let’s Talk About Mirror Neurons.

Let’s talk about mirror neurons. Ever wonder why you walk away from interacting with someone feeling better… or worse than you did before your interaction with them? Here is a quick and easy explanation.

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The Dark Path of Assuming

When something hard or difficult or perceived as hard or difficult is presented in our life, whether it’s a decision we have to make, a conversation we need to have, or a task or project we’re expected to complete. What do we tend to do?
Assume. And some of my clients take assuming to a whole other level…

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What’s Wrong With Being A People-Pleaser?

I was talking with a client who is going through my 8-week Mental Fitness Bootcamp and they asked me:
“What is wrong with being a people-pleaser, isn’t it good to help others?”
Yes, of course… But NOT at the expense of your own wants and needs.

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I Will Be Happy When…

We tell ourselves, “I will be happy when…” Then, when we reach the desired goal and happiness isn’t standing there waiting for us so we can live happily ever after, we assume it was the wrong goal. Standing in our void of happiness, we shrug our shoulders and create a new happiness destination.

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Everything Isn’t About Me

When people speak, they are just presenting their opinion or preference. When people are mean they are just revealing their insecurities. Or they are not being mean at all, I am filtering what they are saying to make it about me causing me to stand in victimhood. Everything isn’t about me. When people ask questions, they are being curious, they are not accusing me or passive-aggressively insulting me.

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Why is ghosting becoming the norm? Why is this acceptable?

It takes confidence, self-assuredness, and respect for others to reply to a call or email, especially when it’s someone you know or have been communicating with. What happened to the simple act of telling someone “Thanks” when you receive the email containing something you discussed they’d send you?

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Roadmap to Change

New thoughts lead to, New choices that, Create new actions that, Introduce new experiences that, Generate new feelings and emotions that, Lead to more new thoughts that,
Alter your biology and Ultimately change your brain.

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The Brain Thinks But The Heart Knows

It’s said that “The brain thinks but the heart knows.” But for some, the brain is so loud and demanding that the messages from the heart become mere whispers. These messages that hold our best interest, our wants, needs and desires can go unheard.

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Through Failure to Opportunity

Day after day I have conversations with people who are stuck. When they tell me their story of stuckness, they inevitably revolve around a perceived failure they cannot move on from… Let’s flip the script regarding failure and the power “fear of failure” can have over us.

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No Valid Excuses

“I can’t do that so many people are already doing it.” Yes. But they have proven there’s a need. Go do it your way, be different. People need a variety to choose from. No one thing is a good fit for everyone.

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Leaders vs. Micromanagers

So many micromanagers think they’re good leaders. Not everyone is meant to be a leader. There’s more than one way to do a job or complete a task and pretty much all of them are “the right way”. Are you a leader or micromanager?

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The Danger of Assuming

I’ve been having more and more conversations these days about assuming. Specifically, regarding people avoiding conversations that are in their best interest because they assume it

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